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Thursday, July 23, 2009

Lifestyle choices - and the List of Liberties Lost.

Lifestyle choices.
Yep. That’s top on my list of things to be concerned about.

Give me a break. Please. In fact, give yourself a break if you happen to be one of these food, environment or government healthcare NAZI types. Do yourself a favor. Don’t come out to the real world to talk about this. You won’t be well received.

I don’t know how many folks out there are tired of turning on the television only to see some 92-pound bleach-blonde telling us what we should buy at the grocery store, but I am well sick of it. In fact, I can feel my blood pressure rising just thinking about it. I don’t even need to develop high cholesterol or diabetes, or any other illness to put me at risk. All I need is another self-righteous, stick-person to get on TV and talk about how fat people are the “biggest” issue in America right now, and my head will probably explode.

The latest in this string of stringy types is MeMe Roth, President and Founder of the “National Action Against Obesity.” Through education, legislation and parental action (according to their stated mission), MeMe and her group of cult-like foodies would like to control what people can buy or eat, what schools can distribute in the lunch-line, and what type of exercises everyone should participate in “across all ages.” Don’t images of long lines of dutiful citizens doing calisthenics in fields filled with alternative energy wind-turbines, just bring tears to your eyes?

According to NAAO’s website, “when the majority is overweight, America cannot be normal.” So we must conform. We must conform NOW!

But before we do, let’s just take stock of the liberties we are losing both with recent legislation and the push for further government interference by groups like Roth’s. Following is my “Basic List of Liberties Lost.” It’s a work-in-progress, kind of like my physique, so cut me some slack, OK?

Anyway, here they are:

1. You won’t be able to buy anything bigger than a clown car. The clown car must run on carefully collected moose farts – or something like that.
2. More than half your income will be going to pay for the latest batch of government bailouts, turtle crossings and moose fart collectors. More than half of your children’s and grandchildren’s and possibly great grandchildren’s income will go to paying off the debts the government is incurring today paying untold billions for untold idiot reasons. Three generations down the road, if organizations like our current administration and NAAO have their way, we will all be skinny peasants working in volunteer turtle and moose fart government programs.
3. You will no longer be able to choose your own doctor or control your own health care. You will be part of a “community” care system. Marxist government officials will determine what care is appropriate for you and you will be prioritized. They will decide whether you live or die and the lives of your parents and children and grandchildren will also be controlled by these policies. Wildlife like the Moose and turtles will be better protected than your children. The new U.S. version of KGB, or their trained observation turtles will observe and report any violators. Undoubtably, excrement regulatory police will measure our sewer output to make sure we aren't sneaking Twinkies.
4. The intimate details of your medical data will be available to these same government officials and poop police.
5. You will be less able to get a job because there won’t be much other than government and “volunteer” positions to fill. That's OK, though, because the vast protections offered wildlife will mean a spike in the turtle population. Whole new agencies will be needed to count them.
6. You won’t be able to spend your money on an item like tobacco or alcohol without Uncle Sam keeping knowing about those purchases – and using that data to possibly deny medical care in the future. Better put down that package of hot dogs; it's probably got government tracking devices all over it - like all the copies of Catcher in the Rye.
7. Taxes on goods will increase the cost of foodstuff and perhaps other items, which you buy day to day. There will be an additional tax on air, because if you have a few extra pounds you will be using more oxygen and exruding more waste into the environment. Basically, your personal carbon footprint will also be called "huge."
8. And of course, those items, which are not on some kind of “approved” list, will have some kind of surcharge placed upon them - like socks. I haven't heard anything on the sock thing, but I know it's coming.

What’s next? Any guesses?
Thought-police anyone? Better control on the media – maybe only media who agree with the administration? How about only media who all fit in size six clothing. Subdermal microchips, so we don’t get lost? Don’t think any of it is at all preposterous. It’s all on the table, now. But don't worry, at least we'll be thin enough to fit in the clown cars with our pet turtles.

Does anyone else see the dangers involved here? Is anyone else outraged at the constant inane babbling of the lifestyle NAZIs?

As disgusted as MeMe obviously is over the over-weight among us, I for one, am disgusted with those like her, who would project their belief systems – indeed, seek to force their belief systems onto the rest of humanity.

Roth decided to single out the new Surgeon General appointee, Dr. Regina Benjamin, explaining that Dr. Benjamin should not have stepped forward at all because of her weight. Roth suggested that young women need a good-looking role-model … I guess that is more important than Benjamin being a qualified doctor. Oh, and don’t we already have a new, fit, role model for young women – Miss America? What about the new Miss California? Can we add that to her job description?

Here’s some suggestions for Roth and anyone else who wants to play fitness police over top-notch people like Benjamin:

Go to medical school, develop a resume that would allow you to compete with someone like Benjamin, have some kids, raise a family, live in the real world, and then feel free to criticize the rest of us.

Just don’t expect us to listen - and definitely don't expect us to invite you over for dinner.

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